The Difference Between Male and Female Depression

The Difference Between Male And Female Depression



When I was in school studying to be a therapist I was taught that depression (and other diseases) were gender neutral. If someone broke a leg the doctor didn’t have to wonder whether it was a male or female before knowing how to fix it. But recent research is turning sex-neutral medicine upside down.

In my post Hey Guys, Are You Depressed and Don’t Know It? I talked about the reasons depression is often hidden in men. Guys tend to "act out" our depression through such things as irritability, alcohol use, and overwork. Women tend to "act in" their depression through such things as self-blame, overeating, and taking care of others. But it is turning out that sex may be a key determining factor in how we heal. “We are different, and vastly so, in every system of the body,” says Marianne J. Legato, M.D., Founder of the Partnership for Gender-Specific Medicine, “from the skin that covers us, to the hearts that beat within our chests, to the digestive system that processes the food we eat. Nowhere is this more true than in the brain, the 3-pound organ that houses all that makes us human.” As we get older more and more of us are experiencing times of where we are depressed. However, I’ve found that men and women often have very different ways of expressing our emotional pain. Not all men express depression in the typical male mode and not all women express it in the female mode, but I’ve found that a gender-specific understanding of depression can help us understand why men and women are the way we are.

Females: Turn their pain inward
Males: Direct their pain outward

Females: Blame themselves
Males: Feel others are to blame

Females: Feel sad, apathetic, and worthless
Males: Feel angry, irritable, and ego inflated

Females: Feel anxious and scared
Males: Feel suspicious and guarded

Females: Avoid conflict at all costs
Males: Create conflicts

Females: Cover their pain by being nice
Males: Are overtly or covertly hostile

Females: Withdraw when feeling hurt
Males: Attack when feeling hurt

Females: Have trouble with self respect
Males: Demand respect from other

Females: Feel they were born to fail
Males: Feel the world set them up to fail

Females: Feel slowed down and nervous
Males: Feel restless and agitated

Females: Trouble setting boundaries
Males: Needs control at all costs

Females: Feel guilty for what they do
Males: Feel ashamed for who they are

Females: Uncomfortable receiving praise
Males: Frustrated if not praised enough

Females: Finds it easy to talk about weaknesses and doubts
Males: Terrified to talk about weaknesses and doubts

Females: Strong fear of success
Males: Strong fear of failure

Females: Need to "blend in" to feel safe
Males: Need to be "top dog" to feel safe

Females: Use food, friends, and "love" to self-medicate
Males: Use alcohol, TV, sports, and sex to self medicate

Females: Believe their problems could be solved only if they could be a better (spouse, co-worker, parent, or friend.
Males: Believe their problems could be solved only if their (spouse, co-worker, parent, friend) would treat them better.

Females: Constantly wonder, "Am I loveable enough?"
Males: Constantly wonder, "Am I being loved enough?"

What have you observed about male and female depression?


I Could Not Get the Heading Of This Article To Print. Sorry